Saturday, October 10, 2009

Twenty-Two Years

Wow, it is 10/10/2009! That may not be a signifigant date for most of the world but to me it is a milestone in my life! Twenty-two years ago today I married the man I thought I would spend the rest of my life with. I was 18 years old, young and niaeve. I loved him with my whole heart! With all of me that there was to give, I gave to him. As far as I was concerned it was for life.

But my dreams and wishes were not to come true. I hung on for 12 years. Seven more than he wanted. On our fith anniversary he told me he didn't love me and didn't want to be married to me any more but I couldn't and wouldn't believe it. So I tortured him and made us both missrable by forcing him to stay married to me for the next seven years.

They were very unhappy years for both of us. Most of those years were spent apart and the little bit of time we were together we were fighting and misrable. The ONLY good thing that came out of those last seven years together was my son Mathew. God in His graciousness saw fit to give me a treasure that has been the joy of my heart and life for the last fourteen years. So I can't be sorry for the years. They weren't wasted. But they are poinantly sad especially on this day every year when I remember the young girl filled with dreams of the perfect life with her prince charming.